Inkpotamus

Forty thousand years ago,
When Europe was a land of snow,
And mammoths roamed the permafrost,
Two Stone Age hominids got lost.

With ease (both being broad and stocky),
They scrambled over ice all rocky.
But a blizzard worse than they could brave,
Made them shelter in a cave.

They'd failed to find a scrap to eat,
As the howling snow had got them beat,
So they set a fire and sat all day,
Their tummies rumbling in dismay.

'Twas then that one Neanderthal,
Looked with hunger at his pal.
Slavering, he licked his lips,
And gazed upon those meaty hips.

Picking up a piece of rock,
He gave his mate a mighty knock.
Then cut off slices from his bum,
And on the fire he cooked his chum.

He finished off the meat he'd served,
Then thought a moment and observed:
"No greater love has friend for me,
Who lays his life down for my tea."